What I should have said
by WritingReaper
Summary: A story of Akashi's first love and how he became the fearless leader of Rakuzen. From the moment he saw her, he hated her. He couldn't understand why she would be so happy in a place like this, what could possibly the reason she smiled everyday? It was then he realized everything he should have done.I do not own Kuroko no Basket, all rights to their rightful owners. Please enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

**Teaser: Akashi's last and first love.**

I've never really known what the feeling of love is since all I have been taught to do is win. Without winning there is nothing, and without nothing you are nobody. This is what I was taught by my mother and father at a very young age. Although, meeting her I didn't know what I felt, in fact to this day it is still not clear. Perhaps it's love or the empty void I longed for affection but whatever it is, I will let you decide.

I'm not sure what it is about her that makes me remember her as I do. The thoughtfulness that came from all the girls at Teiko was nothing compared to hers. With every day, generosity spilled out from her even with what little she had to offer. She was the type of girl that you imagined came from a dream. A wonderful dream that you wanted to stay in forever and if you woke up, you would be picturing how the dream would continue. Except, this was reality to me. In the span of three months I was able to feel that warmth inside of my chest.

Sometimes I think what would be different if I went back and met her sooner or added more time to spend with her. But actually, I would only ask for only a moment to tell her what I should have said. Seeing her every day, the courage I built up on the way to her disintegrated as soon as I saw her. Our conversations would always lead to the deepest thoughts I held inside and her, I can't even describe how uplifting it was to talk about it with her. She was the type of person who opened me up as easy as a book, the comfort I felt is nothing that I knew was possible. She understood me before I even needed to explain, even though she had it harder than I did and yet she never once complained.

I envy her happiness to this day.

I won't leave you hanging anymore, I will tell you the story of the only girl I've ever cared for.

It all started my last year of middle school before our final tournament….


	2. Chapter 2 :The Beginning

" _You are more to me than you could ever know Akashi, more than anything I could ever ask for."_

He longed for the warm sensation of her touch and the embarrassed laugh she tried so hard to supress. The realization that she would never be in his arms, caused him to feel the already shattered pieces of his heart to crumble into finer bits. There was nothing left to do in this world, except win.

-Present Day-

"Tei-ko Tei-ko Teiko"

The gymnasium echoed the chants of the Teiko basketball team members as they made their rounds around the gym for their end of practice cool down.

"Seijuro –senpai, are we finished yet?" complained a first year.

Akashi stopped to jog in place and turned to face the clutter of first years, second years and fresh new recruits. The new recruits and a clutter of first years were panting as they clutched their sides to catch their breath. Making eye contact with Kise, he nodded.

"Alright, practice is ended".

A flood of sighed reliefs slipped out of the group. They bowed to their captain and one by one, left the gymnasium to change. All left except Midorima.

"You know its bad luck for Sagittarius's today without a red scarf."

A quick glance at Shintaro and Akashi walked over the lone basketballs scattered around them gym. Picking them up one by one, he rolled them over to Midorima who shot them flawlessly into the awaiting basket one by one. Shooting the last one in, Midorima turned his head to see a quick glance at Akashi's back before exiting the gym into the change rooms.

Entering inside, Akashi took notice of the clutter dispersed within the change rooms. He sighed as he tugged his shirt over his head and replaced it with his button up school uniform.

"You heading somewhere?"

Akashi turned to see Shintaro leaning up against the doorframe. Shutting his locker, he sighed. _Why did the fortune Gods always tell Midorima the unnecessary?_

"You ended practice early, so I assumed you had a reason."

"I have somewhere to be actually. You know the drill."

Nodding to himself, Midorima walked over to his locker and dug inside _._

" _Hey before you go take this with you."_

Tossing an object to Akashi, he quickly caught it and shoved it into his bag before leaving. Watching out the window, Midorima watched as Akashi exited through the school dates and in his family car. _May fortune be with you today Akashi, you are going to need it._

Akashi made his way into the dark vehicle before promptly seating himself down to find the car empty. He seemed slightly relieved but stressed at the same time since the absence of his father meant there was more work to be done than usual today. Leaning over, he pressed a button that sat readily on the armrest closest to him. The partition rolled down to show a man in about his thirties dressed in a dark suit making frequent glances to Akashi in the rear-view mirror.

"Is there a request you would like to make ?"

Akashi sighed, he hated it when people referred themselves to him in a lower manner.

"Just wanted to know where my father would like me to spend my training today."

"I'm sorry sir, all I know is the address and to deliver you there by 6:15."

"That's quite alright, thank you."

Nodding in courtesy, the partition rolled back up to recreate the division Akashi had from the rest of the world. He peered out the tinted window to see buildings and groups of people pass by in a sudden blur, he leaned his head against the window and stared dully at the dark carpeted flooring. Closing his eyes, he dreamt of the sweet embrace and love that he missed so dearly. The loss of his mother happened to him at an early age but the loss of her was still fresh in mind.

After a long car ride, he took the handle of the door and walked out in one fluid motion into the building. Taking in the scent of heavy sanitization and the soft shuffling of scrubs, Akashi made a beeline for the front desk. The nurse looked up unimpressed as the red headed figured approached, she cocked up an eyebrow taking in his crisp uniform and the posture that held high authority.

"Hello there, I was wondering where my father wanted me to go."

The nurse scoffed, "Look kid I don't know who your father is bu-".

"Last name Seijuro."

Puzzled, she stared at him quizzically as she adjusted her light blue nurse's cap. Her eyes widened as the gears in her head started to turn. This was the son of the business man who owned this hospital. Bowing quickly she spoke,

"I'm terribly sorry young master, how inconsiderate of me not to recognize you! Please forgive me I promise it will not happen again. My acti-".

Akashi cut her off promptly.

"If you don't mind I would like to know where to go in order to finish my duties on time."

"Yes, yes of course."

Flustered, she grabbed the phone next to the pile of awaiting charts and quickly dialed a number. Holding up the phone to her ear, she looked up at the unamused heir to make brief eye contact before a stern voice interrupted.

"Yes, Nurse Kimura?"

"H-hello sir? I understand that I am only supposed to call in regards to the hospital bu-".

A huff came from the other side before speaking. " **OUT** with it Head Nurse."

"Y-yes sir! Your son, Akashi sir. He is here and is asking where you would like him to go."

A long silence seemed to pass the time before a long exasperated sigh came from the other line. The nurse chewed her lip nervously as she anticipated what was coming next. From Seijuro's eyes, he could see what she knew ringing up his father was not a good move.

"I do not have time for such frivolous phone calls Ms. Kimura, I specifically left instructions regarding where my son's duties for the time being. Please do not call again unless it is a dire emergency regarding this company or else I will have to start looking for a new Head Nurse, now do I make myself clear."

"Y-yes sir."

The line went silent before anymore conversation could be made. Akashi watched as Nurse Kimura started to quickly type on the keyboard next to the phone. Her confused expression caused Seijuro to sigh deeply, she wasn't aware of where she was supposed to send Akashi and the instructions of his father didn't add any aid. He look up at the clock 6:30, he could walk around and wait for his duties before 7 when his father left the hospital office, Akashi would be able to ask his father's secretary of what his tasks were.

He glanced back at the Nurse who looked as if she was in dire pain to figure out the issue at hand. Walking backwards, he slowly stepped away from the desk as the Nurse had her back turned, to talk to an interruptive patient.

Turning on his heels, he set off for the stairs which seemed like a safer choice if he wanted to avoid getting stopped by the confused Nurse Kimura. Pressing the handle of the door, he made his way up the brightly lit stairwell. Ascending the stairs, he felt the repetition of his life schedule play into his head. The end of school, the duties from the end of the day till night fall, the homework and the repeat into the next day. Pushing a nearby door, Akashi looked up to see a hallway decorated with doors on either side. Children ran to and fro towards the doorways of the rooms with the occasional chime of **"HEY!"** and **"Put down the catheter!" ,** coming from what seemed to be the nurses. As Akashi made his way down the hallway he noticed a girl inside a room sitting beside an empty bed, looking out the window. She was dressed in a plain shirt with ripped jeans and her hair tied up in a loose ponytail. He took a few steps back to get a clearer glimpse of her face, the soft brown eyes that looked out longingly towards the window, the long eyelashes that seemed to curl up naturally and the small smile that contained what seemed to be the world's happiness inside. One look at her and Akashi knew, he hated every inch of this girl.


End file.
